What Are Your Favorite Role Playing Scenes?
From my photo series “Bad Behavior”
Kara Sutra talked about Roleplaying last week in her SexEd Videos here on PopMyCherryReview. It made me start thinking of all the different role-playing scenarios I have created and my favorite scenes.
In my article last week, Are You Kinky? I defined role playing as:
“each partner tak[ing] on a usually complementary, but unequal, role in which they enact personas and sexual fantasies. Typically, one is the top or dominant (the giver) and one is the bottom or submissive (the receiver), but these roles and activities are also interchangeable. Special forms of erotic role-play include age play, Doctor/nurse or Nurse/patient, Master/slave, Teacher/schoolgirl, puppy and pony-play, Goddess/worshipper, Punisher/victim, play rape scenarios as well as many others.”
In kinky play (or bdsm) we often create rituals and symbolism which facilitate our ability to confront both our fear and attraction to real world horrors. The structure of a scene allows us to create a safe boundary where we can explore sexual fantasies and archetypal roles.
Creating a Scene
From my photo series “Bad Behavior”
First you have to start off with a fantasy. There are lots of bdsm literature and films you can use for inspiration like “The Story of O”, Anne Rice’s “Beauty” series, de Sade’s “Justine”, A Clockwork Orange, Caligula, Lolita, Secretary and even Deliverance… “Cummon, squeal like a piggy!”
One rape fantasy scene I did was inspired by A Clockwork Orange. I got a few of my kinky friends together to create a scene for my little slut, got everyone masks and bowler hats and pretended to break into my house while she pretended to be babysitting. Best part of this scene was, although we had talked about doing a gangbang/rape scene before, she didn’t know this was night, so she was completely surprised by it. The element of surprise added quite a bit to the believability factor and scariness of the scene itself.
Once you have decided upon a fantasy scenario, then you need to decide what you want your scene to consist of. Will your scene focus on dominance and submission, sadism or masochism, or a bit of both? For as Patrick Califia notes in Sensuous Magic, there is a big difference.
“[T]here’s obviously a big difference between a sadistic Mommy, for example, and a dominant Mommy. A sadistic Mommy might construct a scene which gives her as many opportunities to paddle her little man as possible. But a dominant Mommy would be more interested in making him stand in the corner, wear his sister’s clothes, or perform household chores. A masochist slave girl would be very disappointed in a Master who used his whip only to point to the place where she should kneel. A submissive slave girl who got a whipping would assume she was being punished for not pleasing her Master, and this would be a crushing experience for her.”–Sensuous Magic 2 by Patrick Califia
So, you have your fantasy and have decided whether it will be d/s, s/m, or both. Now what? Now you have to put the elements of the scene together.
Be logical about what you can and cannot accomplish. Obviously, most of us don’t have elaborate sets, costumes or props to use. Use what you have on hand, including lighting effects to create the atmosphere you want.
For example, in an interrogation/humiliation scene I did, I had a very bright light shining in my victim’s eyes and silhouetting myself, rope bondage to tie my victim to a chair, and army fatigues I wore with a nasty crop to create the effect of a scary interrogation scenario. So use what you have on hand and for the really necessary stuff, I suggest shopping second hand stores, costume shops, and yard sales. You never know what you will find!
Elements of a Scene
Next, you need to create a loose “script” of your scene. This doesn’t have to be written down and followed to the letter (allow for spontaneity and intuition), but can just be a list of ideas of you want to implement. For instance, when creating my submissive schoolgirl/ Nasty Teacher scene I planned a bunch of activities I wanted to do and got props to go with it.
First I got my schoolgirl to write a paragraph about why she was naughty and why she should be punished. Knowing she had bad spelling and punctuation, this gave me the opportunity to teach her a lesson. So I got her to kneel before a small school desk, bound her arms behind her and taped her tits to the desk (yes, I’m a sadist!). Then I told her she had to recite the alphabet by saying first the letter, the sound it made and a word that started with that letter. This idea came from a real life lesson I had to undergo in school myself by a nasty teacher of mine (make your real life villains your friends!). If my schoolgirl answered incorrectly, she was swatted on her tits with a wooden ruler. Luckily she was a pain-slut, so the scene was very hot. Needless to say it took her a while to do her alphabet correctly, and her tits were pretty sore by then end of it. Afterward she was rewarded for finally finishing the alphabet by a good fucking (which by then she was craving) and an aftercare cuddling.
Ending a Scene
From my photo series “Bad Behavior”
Ending the scene is very important. It is important to end the scene gradually (rather than suddenly) and wind-down slowly.
“Ending a scene takes place in three parts: preparation, closure and aftercare. During the preparation stage, while you’re still actually playing, you need to signal to the bottom that the scene will end soon, so s/he can begin to come back into the real world and pull himself or herself together…”—The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton & Janet W. Hardy [review]
Closure could consist of a reward, including both a physical and verbal affirmation that your bottom did well and pleased you. Don’t simply shove them in a box and throw away the key! (Nasty, nasty!) Aftercare can include staying connected, washing and grooming, food and water, cuddling and nurturing until both you and your partner have had time to return to reality and become grounded.
So, there are three of my favorite scenes that I have created in real-life role playing. I’d love to hear some of your favorite scenes ideas and suggestions. What turns you on and makes you hot? What is a fantasy you’ve always wanted to explore? What was your best scene ever? What books or films make good inspiration?
Please leave comments and share your experiences!