Mind-Gasms and the Art of Thinking Yourself to Orgasm with Kim Airs
Some people say that the mind is the biggest sexual organ, and for Kim Airs this is definitely true. While 70% of women can still only orgasm via clitoral stimulation (and a reportedly 40% of women can’t orgasm at all), Kim, and a few other omni-sexuals, have mastered the art of having an orgasm just by thinking about it. Like, WoW!
It has been a long trip from the days of Hysteria to the sexual revolution when women began allowing themselves to be openly and proudly sexual beings. We found our clitoris and learned the uses of girl’s best friend: a good strong vibrator. We’ve learned its ok to masturbate and to learn about our own body’s sexual responses. From paroxysm via doctor’s massage in the Victorian era, to G-spot squirting and multiple orgasms, we have indeed come a long way baby. But, are these types of orgasms as far as we can go, or are they only the tip of the iceberg?
According to pioneer sexologist and former porn star Annie Sprinkle, there are seven types of female orgasms, and, in her DVD, “Annie Sprinkle’s Amazing World of Orgasm,” she and other sexual experts maintain that there are, in fact, multiple (if not hundreds) of ways to experience orgasm. One of these ways, or techniques, is called a Breath and Energy Orgasm, which is similar to the technique that Kim Airs uses to, as she calls it, “think-off”.
Kim Airs was part of a scientific orgasm study at Rutgers where she was strapped into a MRI so doctors could watch her brain waves as she experienced orgasms without manual stimulation. Look Mom, no hands! I have been fascinated by Kim’s experience, so asked if I could interview her about it and she eagerly agreed. Here is what transpired…
PMCR- How did you learn that you could have an orgasm by just thinking about it? Is this a learned technique?
KA- “Most of my education is learning from the professional organizations I am in, as well as being a voracious reader… I have also taken many, many workshops with Annie Sprinkle (www.anniesprinkle.org and www.loveartlab.org) and Betty Dodson (www.dodsonandross.com), as well as the Body Electric program (www.bodyelectric.org).
I learned [how to orgasm by just thinking about it] by letting myself get there… by breathing and fucking LETTING GO. That’s never been a problem for me anyway but you can’t believe how many women hold back because of their fear of the incredible power of sex. The breath and energy work for being able to “think off’ is by being in touch with your body response and letting your brain go where it wants to… even into the deep, dirty, nasty, erotic thoughts that trickle into the forbidden fantasy world. BUT! I get there by thinking about experiences I’ve HAD, people I’ve done, the smells, their bodies, the places I’ve had the most amazing sex and when I replay those escapades in my mind, it puts me there again and I can even shoot off just by THINKING. Whew.”
PMCR- What was your experience like participating in the orgasm study at Rutgers and getting strapped into a MRI?
KA- “I was recommended for the study by the fabulous sex therapist, Gina Ogden, who knew that I was able to think off. She put me in touch with the researcher, Dr. Barry Komisaruk, who flew me down to Rutgers to participate in the study.
So the study began with a brief interview with about 4 researchers who kept asking me “You can do this?!” And I always responded with a casual “Yeah!” They mentioned that I would have my head taped down onto a tray so it wouldn’t move and I cracked “Well, it’s like a bondage scene – won’t be the first – won’t be the last!” and they all looked at each other like “We have a freak on our hands.”
I was brought into the room with the MRI in it and the best advice I had received from someone who had a head MRI earlier, was to close my eyes as soon as I put my head down on the cradle. That eliminated claustrophobia and the immediate closeness the MRI machine is to your head and eyes. I laid down with a hospital johnny on and was covered by several blankets. I had my right hand under the blankets and thin johnny, and my left hand was on the outside of the blankets with a pulse meter pinched onto my middle finger. It was also at that time that I realized I can actually control my heart rate, something that amazed the researchers and does so with any healthcare practitioner taking my pulse. My head was also taped down onto the tray but I insisted that I had to be able to move my jaw since I was going to be doing a lot of heavy breathing and breath work. I also had these large headphones over my ears in which there were small microphones so I could hear the commands of the researchers over the sound of the hammers in a washing machine effect the MRI creates.
The only way I could signal an orgasm was by raising my left thumb at the moment of ecstasy.
The study started by them checking all sorts of levels and things while I gently slipped into my space of self-sex-hypnosis and pleasure. Then, when everything was set to go, they guided me to 5 rounds of 3 minutes on of touching myself and 30 seconds of not touching myself in between.
I immediately launched into sex energy land and during the 2nd round, I found myself starting to shoot off (another learned response!) and thought “I can’t do that!” and then quickly thought “Yes I can! The table I’m on is plastic and I have layers of blankets all over me!” and whew! The floodgates opened!
Then, when it came time to start the second round of 3 minutes on, 30 seconds off, I was FLYING and it took me a little while to regulate the pace of my breathing. When they gave me the go ahead, I moved my right hand over to my side, and took off from where I left off… and continued in orbit! I even kept shooting off a few times! I totally lost track of space and time and continued through all 5 rounds.
At the end of it, the researchers were pretty amazed with the results. In my headphones, I heard Barry cackle “We’re really interested in the breath and energy work you’re doing… would you mind staying in for another 10 minutes? Try not to have any orgasms, but if you do, just signal it like you’ve been doing.”
I was happy to oblige. I continued doing breath work, visualizing my breath taking many different paths through my body. During one deep breath, when I pulled it up from my lower legs, I could feel that this breath was going to be orgasmic. I pulled it up through my body and instead of returning it through my body (the basis of being able to have multiple orgasms), I let it release through the top of my head, all while raising that precious left thumb to let the researchers know I had yet another orgasm.”
PMCR- What did the scientists figure out from their “study” of you?
KM- “As I was getting the tape removed from my head, Barry leaned over to tell me “During that last round of breath work, we could actually SEE the orgasm coming in your brain even before you signaled it.” How fucking cool is THAT!??!
What they learned was the major reason of the study: it was to compare the brain waves of women who report orgasm who are paraplegic (no feeling in the legs) and quadraplegic (no sensation in arms and legs) against the brain waves of able-bodied women to see if the brain waves during orgasm are any different. The result? The brain waves are THE SAME! The reason? Sexual function travels from the genitals to the brain via the pudendal nerve which does NOT reside in the spinal column but parallel to it. So a woman (or man) who has spinal cord injury can enjoy a healthy sex life. The results of this study and others are available in the book “The Science of Orgasm” by Dr. Barry Komisaruk, et al.
They also learned three things about me: one, I’m a multi-orgasmic FREAK and they gave me the strangest looks as I righted myself up from the table with my hair fucked up and an orgasm flush like they had never seen before; two, that I CAN orgasm without using my hands: and three, that my brain is very healthy (despite those dirty thoughts running through it!).”
PMCR- How can other women learn to think themselves to orgasm? Any tips?
KA- “Yeah… as I mentioned… letting go can be totally transformative. It always puzzles me why women don’t do this more often – is it because they’re afraid of ruining their make up? Making funny faces? Grunting like the animal we all become when we let go? FARTING?!?? I mean, I can’t tell you the glazed expressions I get from guys when I ask them “How is sex for you when women let go?” I CAN tell you that most guys will not care one bit about that runny mascara, that scrunched up face, that deep, hard breathing that comes out when you’re getting thoroughly fucked and I’m sure they’re not gonna think about your farting when the sex is that great.
Also, I firmly believe that so many women are afraid of having such mind-blowing, orgasm inducing sex. Think about it. Women are unaware about how powerful women’s sexuality is. WE CAN TOPPLE GOVERNMENTS WITH OUR PUSSIES. I mean, it’s pretty strong stuff and all women have what it takes! They just have to let themselves go there.”
Recently, Kim Airs also participated in a film called “Orgasm Inc.” that critiques Pharmaceutical companies need to “cure” “female sexual dysfunction”, or if the condition really even exists.
PMCR- What’s the film about and what role did you play in it?
KA- “The film is about how Big Pharmaceutical companies want to make “female sexual dysfunction” a medical condition so they can make a drug for it and make lots of money. Look at what getting a hard on with Viagra did for Pfizer… it reaped (and continues to) BILLIONS of profit. So, they think they can develop a drug pretty easily but, anyone who knows women, know that women’s sexual function is way different than pumping some blood into a tube steak and popping off a load.
I had been put in touch with a drug company, Vivus, to develop a series of videos to have women testing the drug watch so they could see what their sexual response to the drug was. I needed someone to edit it and asked my pal, Liz Canner, a documentary film maker, to edit it with me and her first question was “You’re doing this for WHAT?!”
The film has played many film festivals and I encourage people to put it in their Netflix queue and if enough people request it, it will get picked up so you, too, can learn about female sexual dysfunction in the privacy of their own homes! It’s actually a funny movie and you’ll enjoy it. You can read more about it at Orgasminc.org.”
For many women, “female sexual dysfunction” is a real enough disorder. But, could Kim be right? Could a lot of our sexual [dis]functions only be in our heads, and the fear of letting go and being sexual? Could hundreds of years of sexual repression still be haunting us today? And, if so, if we did let go, I mean really let go, could we all experience mind-gasms and just “think-off” into ecstasy? Is our mind both the cause, but also the cure? Lots to THINK about!
About Kim Airs:
After leaving her high ranking administrative job at Harvard University in 1993, Kim Airs went on to sell rubber dicks in her award winning sexuality shop, Grand Opening! <www.grandopening.com>. She is a member of ISSWSH – the International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health (www.isswsh.org) and was one of the original members (since 1998) and of AASECT – the American Assoc. of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (www.aasect.org). Kim blogs at Xbiz.com with her regular column “Inside the Toybox” and teaches seminars and workshops all over the US. You can also check her out on Facebook and Twitter. She is clever, witty, opinionated and blunt, and rides a killer motorcycle.